Tuesday, June 15, 2010
My Cat Can't Do Keg-stands
My cat just sits around the house, looking like a real a-hole. He probably has no idea what's going on in the world around him. Shouldn't he be all happy, since he's all ignorant 'n' stuff? What the hell? Instead, he's just a cantankerous curmudgeon. There is no curmudgeon I want to bludgeon more than my cat, sometimes. Look at him, just sitting there, with his fur. I want to give him kisses, but he jilts my affections. Yesterday, he swiped at me for no reason and snagged the skin of my forearm with his claw. Two days ago, he bit into the meat of my tricep. He seemed to do this with malice. Or was it pleasure? Who can really know? He definitely has some emotional problems, but he's pretty cool, otherwise. I guess I'll stay friends with him.
Tomorrow, we are taking the students on a visit to Fordham University, in the Bronx. I feel like everyone tries to make college seem like it's so hard, when really it's easier and more fun than secondary school. I plan to drive this point home to my students, tomorrow. I want to encourage them and get them excited about college, not scare them. I hate when grumpy people try to teach kids about how life sucks more and more as you get older. True. Many people become unhappy as adults, but life doesn't need to be like that, and it shouldn't be like that. It should get better as you grow older. Once those kids get a couple of keggers under their belts, they'll know what I'm talkin' about, eh? Eh? You know what I'm sayin'. The keggers. I was all about the keggers in college. Just ask my college buddies. Nuts. Case race, dude. Friggin' case race.
Beer pong, even? Probably.
My cat wouldn't know the first thing about college. He hasn't the foggiest idea what the word college even begins to mean. He only understands kitty prattle. What a dunce-wad. He's cute, though. He looks like Falcor, from The Neverending Story.